50 Bloomfield Avenue, Hartford, CT 06105 Tel: (860) 233-9897 / FAX 233-1333 Email: firstunitarian@ushartford.com Reverend Barbara Jamestone, PhD

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(Services are currently at 9AM and 11; 10 Summer) Unitarian Society of Hartford Welcoming Congregation 2007 - 2008 Mission To honor the inherent worth and dignity of people of all sexual orientations within our congregation and in the larger community. To bring what the Unitarian Society of Hartford has created into our community while continuing to nourish our congregation's diversity. What's up with the WC? Having accomplished the Welcoming Congregation Designation, and putting up a new sign proclaiming it – we ask ourselves what is next? Our commitment to social justice is paramount at USH - and how can we contribute to that goal as a Welcoming Congregation? This year and next we will work toward becoming an Interweave Chapter, the first in Connecticut. Interweave has service at its core, and aims to make the religious alternative at the UUA known and accessible to the LGBTQI community. The Unitarian Society of Hartford is planning several events this year toward this goal, among them a strong presence at area Gay Pride events, and a reach out to lesbian and gay youth in our community. The group would like to hold a social event, as well, attracting participants from area congregations who are interested. Save the Date! The WC will be hosting a Valentine's Celebration on February 14 at the Meeting House. More details to follow! Links of Interest Unitarian Universalist Association Welcoming Congregation Webpage Interweave Continental - Unitarian Universalists for GLBT Concerns True Colors - Sexual Minority Youth and Family Services PROFILES PAST & PRESENT We've Come a Long Way Baby... Welcoming Then... Phebe Ann Coffin Hanaford More Welcoming Now... Gail Syring …those Women who fared best in the nineteenth-century ministry were generally unencumbered by the trappings of heterosexuality. Phebe Coffin Hanaford, for instance, had married Joseph Hanaford…after devoting herself to domestic life for a few years she turned to writing to supplement her husband's income, and then at the age of 35, to preaching. In 1868, with her children almost grown, she was ordained a Universalist minister. For approximately 20 years she had parishes in Massachussetts, New Jersey, and Connecticut and earned salaries equal to very well paid men… …How did Hanaford move from housewife to renowned minister and lecturer? ...Her husband's letters make it clear that it was not with his approval… "preaching a doctrine as diverse from mine (himself, a Baptist minister) …as day and night, light and darkness!... such labors which must be crushing, such as no real woman can long bear…" He accused women's rights leaders as being of scandalous repute and warned his wife, "Decent women will soon find it necessary to secede [from the movement] or remain in bad company." …Though Phebe found no support from Joseph in her work as a minister and women's rights lecturer, she was encouraged by Ellen Miles, a teacher and writer, with whom she lived for more than 30 years after leaving her husband…Ellen Miles' letters to Phebe make a telling contrast to Joseph's….they reiterate her loving passion:…"My loved one, my first written word shall be to you, my darling, who comes first to my waking tho'ts, and last before my eyes close to sleep…It seemed to me I left all the world behind when I left you at that depot, and I could not keep the sobs down all the way out." …Phebe and Ellen surrounded themselves with those who were not "real women" in Joseph Hanford's definition of the term. Their letters indicate close friendships… [upon Ellen Miles death] one refers to "the golden links that bound you two together…I know how lonely and desolate life must be to you, if you should think of her as utterly gone from you - But I do not believe that - I believe she is with you - the one she loved best, all the time." Excerpt from To Believe in Women by Lillian Faderman, 1999. My spiritual identity, my career aspirations and my sexual orientation have always been inextricably linked, because all of the passion in my life comes from the same source. Little did I realize as I was peeking out of the closet when I was 18 how essential this connection would become to my faith development. At the time, I was only thinking I had a huge crush on my Resident Assistant, Maureen. Looking back on that relationship now, with the nostalgia we all reserve for our very first loves, I can only think wistfully, "Ah yes, I remember when I was that young and stupid!" Among the many lessons about life and love that I learned in those early years were a few more subtle, if no less painful truths about my faith community. The church of my childhood had no place for me, and I found myself seeking a spiritual home that allowed me both the space to search for my own truth, and the comfort of a community of like minded people. It took nearly fifteen years to find my way to that home in Unitarian Universalism. In the meantime, I sought spiritual solace and social activism in Student Affairs, Women's Studies, and LGBT issues in Connecticut, while trying to learn how one has a successful adult relationship. Again and again I found myself dedicated to living my life as though each day was both my promise and my prayer. I was trying to be the change I wanted to see in the world, and needed to find the people who had made similar promises. When I made the decision to come to church, borne out of a meditation on destiny, there was no doubt in my mind that I would choose the Unitarian Society of Hartford. The Welcoming Congregation icon on the sign was pivotal in that decision, and when I pulled into the parking lot, I found the car with the most LGBT positive bumper stickers I could find and parked next to it. I figured if the person who owned that car was welcome, then so was I. From the parking lot to the Director of Religious Education, my path has been supported by this congregation, to whom I am profoundly grateful. Belonging to the Unitarian Society of Hartford has had a monumental impact on my life, and continues to be my touchstone as I pursue seminary, determined to be as true to myself as I wish each of our children to be.

Let us know of any comments, errors and corrections - thanks (revised 11/20/07) Page Credits Rainbow Welcoming Chalice: http://www.uua.org Rainbow Line: http://www.angelfire.com/ga/pridepals/